paulacas | Waving Goodbye To 2009 With One Finger--Bent But Not Broken (Reply)

I’ve been contemplating writing this post for several days. The two sides of my brain have been arguing over me being a sentimental sap and nobody wants to read this drivel to me wanting to express my appreciation, and what the support of my flist has meant during the year from HELL.

The year started out so promising and then became an out of control tractor trailer sliding down an icy mountain road to smack nose first into the side of another mountain at the bottom. It started with hubby, Curtis’, paycheck getting cut in half when the company lost a contract to a lay-off in June. His boss telling unemployment he quit instead of him being laid off. We finally won our appeal on December 10^th and were awarded 19 weeks back benefits, and we were able to get our mortgage current.

It took me six months to find a job. Never in my working life has it taken me that long to find a job since I have skills from driving truck to being a computer operator.

Then starts the lovely letters, calls, etc. etc. from the people you send money every month, but now can’t.

I thank all the powers that be each and every day for the financial support from my father. Without his help we would have lost both our car and house during this fiasco.

No matter what all the pop shrinks and self-help books tell you—no relationship is 50-50 and ours is no different. We’ll have been married 24 years come January 11, and have managed to make it through many a storm, this year has been our Perfect Storm.

I’ve always been the one to handle the bills and the checkbook, and he has always been something of a spendthrift, usually with good intentions or thinking it was something that would improve our situation. I am the ‘rock’ and he is the ‘ranter’. Needless to say our roles have been seriously stressed, occasionally to the breaking point in the past year.

Not having a spare shoulder to cry on or rant to, much of my emotional upheaval has been expressed through my writing, of which even I can see an improvement. *Shudders* at some of my earlier efforts.

I want to thank everyone who has sent encouragement. You’ve kept me plugging away. I’ve written in my head all my life (spent a lot of time alone as a child), but only recently had the gumption to put any of it on paper. Your support means the world to me, and has been a light at the end of the tunnel that was not a runaway train.

To the lovely people who are responsible for Comment_fic, many kudos and hugs. Comment_fic got me to actually writing and posting fanfiction though I’ve been a fangirl of it since ummm 1995.

To my flist—there are not enough words to express how y’all have helped me keep my sanity and humor through this year. When things would look bleak, and my ambition level was just enough for me to turn the laptop on for a distraction from RL, there would be something on my flist that would actually make me laugh out loud.

Though it is not nearly enough:

*HUGS & KISSES* and all my thanks.

Blessings & High Hopes for 2010!